Wherever you will Go
by say-chan
Summary: [repost] rated t for suicide, a little violence and slight cursing... [hakuoc] you figure out the rest of the details... set just before the tazuna incident... please R&R!


Wherever you will Go

by: say-chan

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Disclaimer: NARUTO: Not mine, don't sue... 2nd naruto fic, an experimental. Takes place just before the Tazuna bridge battle. Haku/OC. Please R&R! -

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_i know now, just quite how my life and love might still go on, in your heart, in your mind, i'll stay with you for all of time..._

Haku looked over her sleeping figure that night and sighed. He couldn't believe that he was supposed to leave her like this. He did not want to leave her... at least not this way.

"Haku..." Zabuza muttered from behind. "We must..."

Haku looked over his shoulder and replied coldly. "Mou. Just a little while longer, I'll be out in while."

Usually, with this type of rude interruption, Zabuza might have reacted violently, but at this moment, he simply dismissed it. He turned around, walked out of the room and closed the door behind him, leaving his two subordinates behind.

Haku turned back his gaze towards her, gently stroking her hair and admiring her face, illuminated by the moon that shone through the crack on the curtains. He sighed. he knew he made Zabuza angry... He wouldn't dare do it to him again. He licked his dry lips and forced a smile through the mask he was wearing. He just couldn't leave her now, not like this. he swallowed the lump on his throat as he stood up from the side of her bed and took one last look at her.

He sighed yet another time. He has been doing this ever since they found her on a deserted sidewalk one day. Since then, he seemed to have been so captivated by her closed eyelids. He could even remember when he asked his superior who had been unmindful of his interest towards her.

"Zabuza-san, can we _ keep _ her?"

He smiled as he recalled the puzzled expression Zabuza gave him as he looked down at him. The way he asked Zabuza was weird, very weird to be quite exact. She was neither a pet, not an object to be referred to as "_keep_". Nevertheless, with his persuasion and Zabuza's irritancy to the fact that he grew quite amused by her, Zabuza agreed.

They often did things together for Zabuza burdened Haku with the task of "_taking care_" of her, including the occasional ninja lessons that he had to give her in order for her to survive on her own.

"_Take care of her, then. But she has to learn to be independent._" he quoted Zabuza's line.

Indeed, she became independent, too independent, quite stubborn as well. Perhaps this was because Haku spoiled her, but she didn't want him to go soft on her and Haku knew that. The mere purpose of him taking too much care of her was because he didn't want to let go of her. She wanted to learn as much as a drowning man would want air. Maybe that was why Haku grew very _fond_ of her.

There was this one time when Haku was training her to control chakra and walk over the water. the problem was, she lacked concentration so she kept falling, and Haku was always there to pick her up from the freezing water to smile or in some instances, to laugh at her.

But, this never stopped her from wanting to learn more from him and most of the time, about him. She grew very curious about the mysterious ninja she called "_Haku-kun_" who was always hiding behind that hunter-nin mask.

There were times when she was thoroughly annoyed of him. She would say "Haku-kun, stop treating me like a child. I'm not a kid anymore, I can do this." or even "Haku, I don't need you, leave me alone.". But even with her pleas, Haku never left her. His eyes never left her figure. Somehow, subconsciously, Toki never meant any of those either...

In a way, Haku envied her. He envied her because of her free life... of her free spirit. He couldn't deny that he was suffocating from all the abuse Zabuza did to him. Sometimes, he did not want to be bound to Zabuza anymore. But, sadly, he wouldn't dare to tell that to a person whom he owed his life to.

This led to another dilemma. Many people would think that Haku received enough contrapasso from the heavens above but the event was clearly inevitable. She fell in love with the ninja- mask or no mask. She felt as though she slowly gained his trust as she could finally see his deep gray eyes from behind the slits of his mask and as he started letting her play with his hair at times. The "training" sessions became a little bit more often than before. To them, the word "training" gained a new meaning... that included walks through the forest, fishing by the lake and catching dinner as well.

Subconsciously, Haku fell for her as well, although he refused to accept it and remained discreet about the issue. Oftentimes, Zabuza caught him staring at her sleeping figure. Haku didn't care, actually, as long as she didn't know about it. Somehow, he realized that she wasn't the only one learning from this mutual understanding between them. He, too, learned from her as well. Thanks to her, he came to terms with his inner voice which he had thought had been lost years ago.

Most of the time, he was worried that she would hate him for his profession, but as long as she didn't care, he didn't either. The bond between them grew stronger as time passed by, but there were some things Haku left for her to question. Soon, the issue of his mask became very controversial. Oftentimes, she thought she didn't know him at all, but one of the reasons why Haku kept it from her was maybe because she was too special to him, that he didn't want her to be too attached to him or that he just simply wanted her to keep guessing so that she would stay by her side longer. But those were just reasons she coined, and the real reason why he was keeping his face from her was still a complete mystery.

At first, Zabuza didn't mind Haku's certain disregard for his chores and duties, and his slacking in training sessions with him. But soon, he started to sense the growing intensity between them and began to be very strict at the both of them. Soon, Zabuza decided that he would be the one training her since Haku needed to work on his water needle technique as well.

Toki wasn't very amused about Zabuza's decision and neither was Haku. But, both of them had to make way for Zabuza's will for he was still their mentor and the constant rule of superiority was still present and exercised. Haku was very well aware of the benefits they had received from Zabuza. He has developed a great deal of respect towards him. Although, despite those facts, he felt a certain feeling of disgust towards Zabuza for he thought Zabuza did not trust him.

One night, a night not different from any others before it, Haku rose from his sleep and walked to where Toki slept. Smiling, he took off his mask from his face and admired her pale figure bathed in the moonlight.

"You were right. I keep my face from you so I could keep you by my side longer... and guessing as well," he whispered.

She stirred and her motion made Haku put his mask back on to cover his face. Her eyelids slowly opened and she stared at him for a while as her vision began to clear.

"Ha-" she began but Haku put his hand over her mouth to silence her.

"Shh... Zabuza-san's asleep," he whispered. She then sat up and faced him, her deep crimson eyes growing with curiosity.

"What are you doing here?" Haku shook his head and extended his hand.

"It doesn't matter. Can we talk outside?"

Sensing the hint of longing in his voice, she nodded and smiled at him as she took his hand in hers. He pulled her up and held her hand, just the same as he walked in front of her, leading her outside the hideout.

Once outside, Toki sat down by the riverbank and rubbed her eyes. She yawned as she looked up to the night sky above her. Haku then followed after closing the door behind him and sat down beside her.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" she muttered under her breath as she admired the starlit sky.

"Yeah. You too..." Haku whispered as he gazed at her. She looked at him and he dropped his gaze quickly to the ground below.

"You wanted to talk?" she asked, breaking the deafening silence that surrounded them.

He seemed quite reluctant to speak for he didn't know which words to say. There were a lot of random thoughts in his head but he did not know how to pull them together...He always knew how to place his words every time... every time except this one.

"I dunno, the awkward silence is working quite well for me, though..." he replied.

"Haku-kun..." she pressed. Haku sighed and smiled.

"I just wanted to know how your training sessions with Zabuza-san were going..." his voice rattled. "I mean, if he was going too fast on you... and you couldn't keep up... you could tell me and..."

"Haku-kun..." she cut sharply. She looked at him and her lips then curved into a smile. "Thanks, but I'm not a kid anymore, okay? I can do it now."

Haku let out a fake chuckle. "I guess I shouldn't have worried."

"But, seriously, Zabuza-san's been training me like crazy." she said in a low tone. "He wanted me to learn a ninjutsu in just one hour." she continued as she clutched her bandaged left arm to her chest and sighed.

"Really? Then he must be really serious about what he said before. We were really slacking."

Toki smiled. "Yeah, I guess we were."

Usually, they had all the time in the world to talk to each other about everything. But as Haku said, the awkward silence was working fine with them. Zabuza had encouraged them to train at every chance they got, so these "talks" became less frequent. Even if they did get a chance to talk, however, they did not have that much to talk about because of the growing feelings inside them.

Sometimes actions _ did_ speak louder than words.

When Zabuza sent Toki out for her first spy mission, he had the opportunity to talk to Haku in private. Haku had no idea what Zabuza had on his mind, but if he did know, he would realize that he knew more about the issue than he thought.

"It's her, isn't she?" Zabuza asked curtly.

"What? Zabuza-san, I don't understand you..."

"Don't play dumb with me, Haku. You should stop this, the both of you," Zabuza cut in, sharply. "I'm not playing games, Haku. You know rules are strictly to be followed."

"Zabuza-san, I honestly don't know what you're talking about..."

"Remember the rules of a shinobi, Haku. You cannot lie to me. I've been watching you every night. It is not mystery that you have broken one of the rules," Haku could only drop his gaze to the ground as he met Zabuza's icy glare.

"You should stop this nonsense right now, Haku, or else I'll be forced to make do with her myself."

"But Zabuza-san, I-"

"Don't try to deny what you already know, Haku," Zabuza cut in.

"I'm in love with her, Zabuza-san," Haku whispered under his breath in monotone.

"Nonsense! Your path is to become a shinobi, a warrior to fight for me and protect me. Now you're giving me this? For a damned girl? You must be deranged," Zabuza retorted.

"I love her, Zabuza-san," Haku repeated in the same low tone. "And I want to protect her as well."

"She's changing you. That damned girl is changing you. Do you realize that! She's the reason why you're slacking in your duties!"

"Don't you dare speak to me about Toki in that manner."

Zabuza laughed. "So, you've inherited her stubbornness as well, haven't you? What are you to do now, Haku? Are you to fight your superior in such a mediocre condition?" he mocked. "Clearly, you must be joking."

"I do not wish to fight against you, Zabuza-san, but you leave me no choice," Haku replied firmly. "Go ahead, mock me. Let's see what happens."

"Are you trying to threaten me, Haku? Surely you have a plan in mind because with you condition right now..." Zabuza smirked as he left Haku to fill in the blanks.

"Don't look down on me, Zabuza-san," Haku replied fiercely. He had a rebellious look in his eyes.

"Poor Haku, You understand very little of the nature of this situation," Zabuza continued to mock him. "If you do not forget about her, I will kill her."

With that, Zabuza left.

"Over my dead body," Haku muttered under his breath. His eyes widened as he said those words. It was only now when he realized that he was completely defiant of his superior, which never happened, at least not until then. A question then formed in his head.

_Was she worth it? _

Haku blinked and finally snapped out of his reverie as he stared as he stared at her pale figure once more. The answers to his previous questions came to a final conclusion.

"Worth dying for, " he said confidently as he traced her face with his index finger and smiled. Although he did not challenge Zabuza or forget about Toki, he was attached to her somehow, in ways only they know- in ways that only they could imagine.

"I have to go, koishii..." he whispered in her ear. He took off his mask and placed it on top of the blanket she was using. "And I might not make it in time to tell you personally. Maybe this will be the last time that I'll see you. I'm sorry, Toki... I was stupid, I was very stupid not to let you know... I know it's too late, but..."

"Boku wa kimi wo aishiteru..." he continued, using much of his ethnic language that he knew. He kissed her cheek and withdrew from his position. He walked towards the door and hesitated to open the doorknob. He then looked over his shoulder and took one final look at her.

"Sleep well, koishii..."

Hours later, Toki woke up and found Haku's mask on top of her. Her eyes widened in shock as her tears started to fall. She figured that they had left without her. She stood up and darted out the door.

She reached Tazuna's bridge but by then it was too late, she was very late. The sun was about to set and Haku and Zabuza lay there, dead. She looked around but nobody else, except kunais and needles on the wet floor, with what had seemed to be remnants of Haku's mirror technique and the blood of those who fought, was there. She fell to her knees and wept uncontrollably beside Haku.

"Why, Haku? Why didn't you wait for me? Why did you have to die?" she asked rhetorically in between sobs. She then stared at his face and wiped the blood from it with her hand.

"Atashi wa anata wo aishiteru. Zutto, zutto." she whispered, as if in a trance, as she placed the first and last lingering kiss on his lips.

She lay down beside him, head on his shoulder. She closed her tearstained eyes, and clutched Haku's hand on hers, and a kunai on the other.

"I'll go wherever you will, Haku..."

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Translations (for the benefit of those who did not understand Japanese)

Mou - Wait

Hontou? - Really?

koishii - dearest

Boku / Atashi wa kimi wo aishiteru - I love you

Zutto - Forever

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a/n:

i guess it's pretty clear on what toki's gonna do next... ;) anyway, i really hope you guys tell me what you think... hehehe... i'll be posting an x-men : evolution fic after this... so, that's that... hi and thanks to all those who know me! luv yah all! enjoy existence! visit my website, guys! repost

say-chan


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